St. Pauli. Mein bisschen Frieden.

Bildschirmfoto 2016-02-19 um 09.48.29

Hamburg, Hafen. Du bist mein Zuhause, mein Kiez, mein St. Pauli. Es ist an der Zeit, dass ich Dir einige Zeilen widme. Denn wie oft bin ich bereits umgezogen, mit meinen 37 Jahren? Bestimmt zehn oder elf mal. Innerhalb der Städte mitgerechnet. Meschede, Münster, München, Mallorca, Marbella. Moment mal. Mich macht mein magnetisches Muster mit M-Metropolen mürrisch. Monotone Macke? Macht Magdeburg Magen-Darm?
Egal. Dann kamst Du! Hamburg, St. Pauli, Du Miststück. Merde.

Dieses Wikipedia sagt, Du bist 2,3 km² groß und damit gehörst Du in das Guinnessbuch der Rekorde, als größtes Herz der Welt. Du nimmst jeden und jeden, wie er ist. Sogar mich. Und diese Wohnung, an der Klappe Deiner Pumpe und mit Blick auf die Reeperbahn, die gebe ich so schnell nicht mehr her.
Der Typ rechts von mir legt sich abends eine Matratze auf den Bürgersteig und wird morgens geweckt, von dem Typ links von mir, bevor der in seinen 911er-Porsche steigt. Unter mir ist um 14 Uhr der Vormittag. Über mir ein Speicher, mein Spielzimmer. 50 Shades of Kramer. Zuckerbrot ist alle.
Der Kioskbesitzer nebenan glaubt an Mohammed, die Vertreter der Heilsarmee schräg gegenüber an Jesus Christus und ich an Charles Darwin. Und Du? Du hast uns einfach alle gleich lieb. Gleich gut. 

Bei Dir knutschen die Frauen und die Männer halten Händchen. Die Swinger, die SMler, die Säufer, die Loslasser und auch die Losgelassenen (die ganz besonders). Du hältst mit uns allen Händchen. Du bist die Hand.
Jedem seine Kneipe, seinen Tresen, seinen Hafen, am Hafen. Für die Gestrandeten und die, die ihren Strand noch suchen und auf gepackten Koffern sitzend den letzten Mexikaner kippen. Du bist das wärmste Jäckchen. Mein Cognäckchen. Pils oder Perignon? Man wird ja wohl noch schäumen dürfen.

Ich gehe an einem stinknormalen Nachmittag unter der Woche in den Edeka, vor mir an der Kasse stöckeln kichernd vier Transen im Olivia-Jones-Kostüm rum und keiner guckt, keiner schmunzelt, keiner macht Fotos. Du bist das Paradies für Vögel und keiner wird darin zur feilgebotenen Attraktion. Rilkes Panther würden die Stäbe zum Steg. Freie Welt. Freier Eintritt.
Unnormal ist hier das normalste der Welt und ich als weißer, heterosexueller Deutscher – ich bin hier der Paradiesvogel. Schöne, verrückte Welt. Jede Farbe, jede Küche, jede Sprache, jedes Land. Homo, hetero, bi, arm, reich oder Durchschnitt. Du durchschneidest nicht. Du bewertest nicht. Und dafür sind wir Dir so dankbar, dass diese Vielfalt und das an Farben frohe funktioniert. Wir leben alle zusammen. Hier. Bei Dir. Weißt Du, was Du für mich bist, St. Pauli? 2,3 km² Welt, so wie ich sie mir vorstelle. Mein bisschen Frieden.

Sicher, Du hast nicht nur zwei Gesichter und am Wochenende bist Du anders. Ganz anders. Am Freitag und Samstag bist Du Attraktion. Da wird vor den Sexshops gekichert und die Selfie-Dichte mit Hashtag „Reeperbahn“ erklimmt die Social Media Charts. Am Wochenende bist Du ein FSK-18-Vergnügungspark, der Scheidepark Soltau und leidest unter Touristen-Tourette. Doch selbst dann spendest Du noch Trost und Hoffnung. Denn jedes Mal, wenn ich einen Junggesellenabschied mit zehn Bekloppten im Mankini oder zehn Beklopptinnen im Bienchenkostüm sehe, die kleine Feiglinge saufen und sich benehmen wie große Feiglinge auf Erwachsenenklassenfahrt ohne Aufsicht, sage ich zu mir selbst: „Ach guck, sogar so etwas wird geheiratet.“

Probleme, Drogen, Gewalt? Gibt es. Wie überall. Aber Du trägst nicht nur Dein Herz auf der Zunge. Du zeigst Deine Wunden. Auch die Offenen. Jedem. Totschweigen? Ist nicht Dein Stil. Ist schlechter Stil. Mögen wir hier nicht. Was andernorts hinter verschlossenen Türen passiert, steht bei Dir im Schaufenster. Es wird gekokst, gespritzt, gesoffen, geraucht und gefickt. So wie auf der ganzen Welt. Du machst nur kein Geheimnis daraus. Wenn ich meine Ruhe haben will, gehe ich in mein Zimmer zum Hinterhof. Wenn ich den Wahnsinn und Deine Farben tief in meine Lungen ziehen möchte, wie der Typ mit der Crackpfeife auf den Stufen vor meiner Haustür seinen Stoff, gehe ich die Stufen runter vor meine Haustür. Der Typ ist sehr nett.
Ich glaube nicht an Schicksal, Fügung oder Eingebung, aber das ich hier gestrandet bin ist irgendwie auch kein Zufall. Vielleicht ist es die Mitte. Deine Mitte. Dein Herz für Bekloppte.

Gut, als ich hier noch neu war und das Haus zum ersten Mal im Anzug und mit Krawatte verlies, da wurde es kurz ungemütlich. Ein Punk rempelte mich an und brüllte: „Kapitalistenschwein.“ Vielleicht hätte ich nicht antworten sollen: „Buchstabier das doch kurz. Und Bitte.“
Die waren zu viert. Ich alleine. Aber ich bin schnell. Sehr schnell. Und die waren besoffen. Sehr besoffen. „Arschloch“, schrie er hinter mir her. „Sorry, dass passiert mir sonst nie“, rief ich zurück. Aber das war nur ein Mal.

Auf der anderen Seite haben sich alle meine bisherigen Nachbarn beschwert, wenn ich Gitarre spielte und alte Songs von Nirvana, Led Zeppelin und Green Day sang. Als ich auf den Berg zog und das erste, zaghafte Anpirschen an die Dezibel-Demarkationslinie meiner neuen Kieznachbarn unternahm, sprach meine tätowierte Nachbarin Mitte 60 mich danach im Hausflur an und fragte: „Hast Du da gezupft und gesungen? War gar nicht mal so scheiße. Mach ruhig mal lauter, dann kann ich Dich besser hören.“
Ich bin zu Hause.

Du bist kein Hochglanzposter. Deine Schönheit muss man suchen. Innere Werte. Ich werde alt. Nein, reif. Reife ist das richtige Substantiv. Substitut bist Du nie. Du bist immer gewollt. Wer in Dir suchet, der bindet. Ich brauche das Martinshorn mittlerweile zum Einschlafen, wie andere Menschen TKKG-Kassetten. Man bricht hier. Frau auch. Du brichst Rotlicht, Blaulicht, Kerzenlicht. Das Prisma des Lebens. Von bis. Alles hier. Und es funktioniert. Mehr Recht als schlecht.

Meschede, Münster, München, Mallorca, Marbella. Und dann St. Pauli. O. K., diesen Traum von diesem Haus mit Garten und einem Dobermann, den habe ich noch. Aber dieses Leben ist so vorhersehbar unvorhersehbar – wie soll ich Dir sagen, was in drei Jahren ist? Ich weiß ja nicht mal, was in drei Wochen ist. Aber ein bisschen lange bleibe ich noch. Denn hier bin ich Mensch, hier darf ich nein sein. Und ja. Und vielleicht. Und die anderen auch. Und keinen stört es.
Hamburg, Hafen, St. Pauli. Frisur egal.
Mein bisschen Frieden.

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